Archive | January, 2013

Break your patterns

23 Jan

Those of us who have suffered with an ED tend to be very rigid. We’re regimented in what we do and how we do it. Everything is calculated. Nothing is spontaneous. We must do X at this time. We cannot eat more than Y. We are only allowed to eat at time Z. Our behaviours only serve to perpetuate these cognitive beliefs. So, what’s a girl to do?

Break your patterns.

Start mixing it up. You always eat breakfast at a specific time? How about eating it when your stomach says so, regardless of the time and your rules? Maybe it will be 13 minutes earlier. Maybe 30 minutes earlier. Just go with it.

 You “have” to run on the treadmill for 50 minutes? Try 45. Heck, really throw your rigid mind off, and stop after 43 minutes or some other ‘obscure’ number. Go crazy.

Greek yogurt is “always” your morning snack. Have an orange and some nuts. Or a piece of toast. “But I had toast for breakfast.” OMG, you’re gonna die.

You have to “always” brush your teeth before you wash your face? Wash your face first. #yolo

You “have” to set your alarm every morning for some rando time. 6:27am, anyone? Ya, stop that. Change it up. Set it for 6:29am. Trust me, you’ll be fine.

It may sound ridiculous to you to make such “minor, insignificant or trivial” changes to your routine. Well, the anxiety that may be elicited won’t likely feel minor. These changes will feel uncomfortable. Some may even say scary. But that’s the point of this whole recovery journey. Stepping outside of your comfort zone. Living in the zone isn’t workin’ too well, anyways.

These small changes will give you a taste of the freedom you could have. You’ll likely feel happy, and maybe even a little rebellious. 😉 That’s good! You can live this way all the time. And soon, these alterations to your schedule will not need to be planned. They can just happen naturally. Because you allow them to.

And when ED throws a little tantrum at the changes, and you think to yourself, “I could freak out so bad right now,” don’t. Panic won’t change a thing. You can sit there and get yourself in such a state, but 20 minutes from then, you’ll be in the exact same place. You just tell ED and that rigid voice (is it the same as ED?) to shut it. Soon, it won’t be bothering you often when you show it who’s boss.

Try it out and let me know how it goes! ❤

Much love and health,

Lauren xo

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Eventually

14 Jan

Right now, recovery may feel impossible. Like an insurmountable task. A mountain too high to climb. An obstacle too difficult to navigate. You don’t even know where to begin.

ok

But you know what? All you have to do is take one baby step forward.

You usually eat a 1/4 cup of oats for breakfast? Eat a 1/4 cup and 1 tablespoon.

You usually exercise for 60 minutes a day? Exercise for 50 minutes today.

You purge your lunch every day? Not today.

Just sit with the desire, that nagging ED voice telling you what you should do and you tell it to shut it. Your self destruction ends today. Right now. Not tomorrow. Now.

If you didn’t eat enough today, get up right now and have a snack. No matter what time it is. Stop following your self-imposed rules. Keep moving forward.

Recovery is not easy or comfortable. You are stepping outside of your ‘safe zone’ where you can partake in all of your maladaptive behaviours. But you know what? They don’t help you. They never did. They don’t make your life any better or easier or decrease your anxiety.

You deserve a full and happy life. One where you wake up excited for the day- just because.

Eating disorders suck your soul. But you can get it back. One spoonful at a time. Never, ever, ever, ever give up on yourself and your life. You are too valuable to lose.

Much love and health,

Lauren xo

Make me laugh

8 Jan

Lookatme! Two posts in one day? Aw yeahhhhh 😉

I think we all need a good laugh! You agree? K, good 🙂

freud

I ❤ Freud memes

friends

But I ❤ Friends even more

god

Not trying to make any kind of a statement with this one- just thought it was funny!

no touch

This kills my sister and I… 😉

ryan

Self-deprecating humour…gotta love it!

try

Oh haaayyyy, Zac 😉

Much love and health,

Lauren xo