Those of us who have suffered with an ED tend to be very rigid. We’re regimented in what we do and how we do it. Everything is calculated. Nothing is spontaneous. We must do X at this time. We cannot eat more than Y. We are only allowed to eat at time Z. Our behaviours only serve to perpetuate these cognitive beliefs. So, what’s a girl to do?
Break your patterns.
Start mixing it up. You always eat breakfast at a specific time? How about eating it when your stomach says so, regardless of the time and your rules? Maybe it will be 13 minutes earlier. Maybe 30 minutes earlier. Just go with it.
You “have” to run on the treadmill for 50 minutes? Try 45. Heck, really throw your rigid mind off, and stop after 43 minutes or some other ‘obscure’ number. Go crazy.
Greek yogurt is “always” your morning snack. Have an orange and some nuts. Or a piece of toast. “But I had toast for breakfast.” OMG, you’re gonna die.
You have to “always” brush your teeth before you wash your face? Wash your face first. #yolo
You “have” to set your alarm every morning for some rando time. 6:27am, anyone? Ya, stop that. Change it up. Set it for 6:29am. Trust me, you’ll be fine.
It may sound ridiculous to you to make such “minor, insignificant or trivial” changes to your routine. Well, the anxiety that may be elicited won’t likely feel minor. These changes will feel uncomfortable. Some may even say scary. But that’s the point of this whole recovery journey. Stepping outside of your comfort zone. Living in the zone isn’t workin’ too well, anyways.
These small changes will give you a taste of the freedom you could have. You’ll likely feel happy, and maybe even a little rebellious. 😉 That’s good! You can live this way all the time. And soon, these alterations to your schedule will not need to be planned. They can just happen naturally. Because you allow them to.
And when ED throws a little tantrum at the changes, and you think to yourself, “I could freak out so bad right now,” don’t. Panic won’t change a thing. You can sit there and get yourself in such a state, but 20 minutes from then, you’ll be in the exact same place. You just tell ED and that rigid voice (is it the same as ED?) to shut it. Soon, it won’t be bothering you often when you show it who’s boss.
Try it out and let me know how it goes! ❤
Much love and health,